Ode To A Monster Fetish

O Beast! is it my aching heart you hear

Or ragged breath that brings you crawling by?

I sweat, I tremble, yet I have no fear;

Our chase is a facade against outcry

For those mere mortals cannot understand

The elegance of your scaled, oozing form

The spray of blood when you killed my friend

Revealed an artist with a loving hand

Paint me crimson! Your claws still dripping warm

Doth bring ecstasy unto my sweet end


These desires are unique to satiate

Would that we could board yonder Nostromo

Where Alien may kill, nay, penetrate

Or submerge ourselves in labs down below

For monsters, water shapes, creatures of the sea

Swampish or scaly, of unknown roots -

Look, I get it, this is quite weird to you

Like who wants to fuck a fish? *sweats* not me!

On this side I say you all look like brutes

Bound in societal restraints - breakthrough!


For what a fool I would be to kink-shame

Those who crave fur or feet or bondage play

In truth and in diapers we are kink-same

Just remember that anyone who says pedophilia is a kink should be punched in the face

Lo! A new day has dawned! To your lover!

Ghosts, ghouls, zombies (if you are into that)!

My beast love - ho! Who restrains you amids -

What mask?? Young ones pull its face and uncover

A human! Lies! What sex we would have shared

If it had not been for those meddling kids


Jackie Shreves is a very angry person who you can frequently find on Whiskey Bear's Pop Culture Mixtape and character roasts. She likes being able to combine her loves of comedy, cosplay, and nerd crap in her sets. Yes, she is the perfect woman. No, you cannot date her.